Sterek - Sourwolf, Sourwolf - Oneshot Wednesday
by nabawrites
Summary: Derek was just minding his own business, reading his book, then Stiles happens, as he tends to do. Awkwardness ensues. A.K.A. the reverse three little pigs au I wrote like two years ago but never actually finished so here it is for my weekly wednesday oneshot!


Sterek – Oneshot - Sourwolf, Sourwolf

Derek Hale was sitting in his loft reading an old book about various supernatural creatures when he heard a car pull up outside. He could tell by the sound of the engine that it was Stiles' jeep. Since Stiles wouldn't let anyone drive his jeep but himself, Derek didn't have to think very hard about who had come to visit. It was just as well. Derek was getting confused about the differences between empousai, pixies, and vampires. Derek heaved a sigh of resignation but decided not to move until Stiles reached the door. When he did, Derek made to get up but stopped when Stiles banged on the door. In a deep growl, Stiles shouted at Derek, "Sourwolf, Sourwolf, let me in!"

Derek's jaw dropped, but he quickly recovered. Crossing his arms over his chest even though Stiles couldn't see him, he deadpanned, "Not by the glorious scruff on my chinny-chin-chin."

Stiles snorted and laughed, loud enough for anyone without supernaturally enhanced hearing to hear from a mile away. "Okay, Sourwolf, that was greatness. Now please open this incredibly heavy door with your superhuman strength. I'm carrying something."

Derek raised an eyebrow (which was just as glorious as the scruff). "I'm pretty sure I just swore by my facial hair that I wouldn't do that. Breaking an oath like that would be sacrilege." Derek didn't hear anything from the other side of the door for so long he began wondering if he was losing his wolf powers again.

Finally, Stiles spoke again, this time with a tone of awe. "Did you just make another joke about your facial hair?" Derek heard him sniff, as if he were crying. "Dude, I am so proud of you!"

Derek rolled his eyes. "If you want me to let you in, I need a compelling reason. Being yourself is not a compelling reason, Stiles."

Stiles huffed. "You big meanie." When Derek didn't move, Stiles relented. "Fine. Consider this, Sourwolf: if you don't let me in, I can't blow you." Both of Derek's eyebrows shot so high up his forehead they dug a shallow grave in his hairline. Derek figured he could bury his sanity there later. Apparently, Stiles had just realized what exactly had come out of his mouth. "Um - I mean, your house. I can't blow your house. Down. Shit. I totally did not mean to say that. Well, I mean, I meant to say that but I didn't mean for it to come out that way, I was just trying to keep going with the reverse three little pigs thing and I totally did not mean to imply that I would blow you or even touch your dick at all because I mean, who even does that- and I am so sorry and I promise not to- actually I'm not going to promise not to do something like that again because I have no filter or control over my mouth- I mean, it's practically a separate entity, itshouldpayitsowntaxesso-"

Derek threw open the door to the loft and leveled Stiles with a deadpan. "I will let you in if you stop embarrassing yourself."

Stiles blinked. "Indefinitely or just for today? Because I'm pretty sure both are impossible."

Derek sighed shook his head. "Just get inside before one of my tenants sees you."

Stiles opened his mouth, paused, closed his mouth, and then walked inside the loft. He set the box he was carrying down on the table before glancing over at what Derek had been reading. "Oh, pixies. Those things are so badass." Part of Derek's consciousness made note to ask Stiles about them later, but for now he just stared. Stiles started getting stuff out of the box, things he'd found at a few crime scenes recently that he was wondering if Derek could identify regarding the supernatural (Deaton was out of town).

After a few moments of Derek not saying anything, Stiles looked up to see the wolf giving him the most intense look of his life. It wasn't even a glare, just... a look. "What?" he asked, his cheeks turning red under the wolf's gaze.

Derek shrugged. "I'm just waiting for you to blow me." Stiles' jaw hit the floor and Derek raised an eyebrow. "You said you'd blow me if I let you in. I let you in." Derek took a step toward Stiles, pressing their chests together so their faces were inches apart. "You weren't bluffing were you?"

Stiles pulled himself together enough to look Derek in the eye. "Depends."

Derek's head cocked to the side, making him look kind of like an angry puppy. "On what?"

Stiles swallowed hard and ignored his heavy breathing. He steeled himself for any response as he replied, "On whether this is going to be a recurring thing or a one time deal."

Derek took in a deep breath through his nose, immediately recognizing both Stiles' anxiety and his hope. His features softened and he leaned his forehead against Stiles', bringing a hand up to caress Stiles' cheek. He waited until Stiles looked him in the eye before replying, holding his gaze. "We can do whatever you want, for as long as you want."

Stiles eyes widened for a moment before his lips broke out into a huge grin, one Derek hadn't seen since before the Nogitsune, before the Alpha pack even. "Then we're doing everything forever, big guy." Derek leaned in to kiss him but Stiles stopped him with a finger on his lips. "You sure you know what you're getting yourself into?"

Derek rolled his eyes. "I've been sure for a really long time, Stiles."

Stiles' eyes got a mischievous glint as his smile turned sharp. "Then let's get to blowing, Sourwolf."


End file.
